A key step in the manifestation process is to ‘surrender it all’ – but how do you do that when so much of our lives are perfectly planned?
I used to think I had to have it all planned out.
My career path. My day. My weekend. My ticket to success.
I’d write lists, read the books, do the journal exercises. I’ve got the vision board and the Dear Future Self letters – it’s all there. All the ‘tasks’ I need to have done to create the life I want.
Ever since The Secret first came out, millions of us have been ticking those manifesting tips off our list, and waiting and wondering when our dreams will come true.
But that’s not how it works.
When I first heard the idea of surrendering from my mentor Belinda Davidson, the inner perfectionist and control freak was not happy. If I surrender (in other words, just let it all go), then how will it actually all happen? Don’t you need me to send that email, make that phone call, research how that will work?
Don’t you need me in there, controlling and manipulating and making it all happen?
And that’s where the lesson of surrender comes in.
Best-selling author of ‘The 5 Regrets of the Dying’ and ‘Bloom’ Bronnie Ware described it to me best:
When we let our plans go, trusting that the bigger picture is so much more beautiful and rewarding than anything we could imagine, we start to make different decisions. We stop hustling and pushing out of fear – instead, we trust that the next thing that shows up is meant to show up, and is leading us down the right path.
But, if you’re new to this surrender journey, or – like me – you love the sound of it and vow to trust the Universe more, and then turn around and make a list of 212 things you need to do in the next month to make that sale/budget/event actually happens, then you’ll need more than just nice words about letting go.
You’ll need trust. You’ll need faith.
Because that’s what it all comes down to.
So – let me share a story with you:
Every single amazing thing that has happened in my life has happened despite me.
Every win, every moment of bliss, every dream that has manifested has come to me naturally – outside of my own hustle.
My book deal came to me, despite pitching my story idea to a number of different publishers and being rejected, when I was not looking for it all. I had gotten to the stage of giving up on my dream of a published book (a key step in the manifesting stage, it seems) and then, when I was still producing ABC Radio, the publicity manager of Affirm Press casually asked me if I’d ever thought of writing a book. She just threw it out there, in the Green Room as we prepped one of her authors for an interview, and it all flowed from there. Within six months, my book was being printed. That’s just how it happens when you surrender.
Need another example?
I’d given up on finding the right guy just weeks before connecting with my husband. I’d had my heart badly broken, and had vowed I would protect myself from anymore heartache for as long as possible. In fact, when my future-husband first put his hand gently on my leg under the table as we all sat around with friends one night, I politely turned to him, took his hand off, and said I can’t do a relationship right now. I totally surrendered to finding ‘him’, and just focused on me. Result? The right guy waited, and the rest is history.
The same with my programs. And the same with my babies. Every single time I’ve tried to manipulate (read ‘plan’) what was going to happen in my life, I’ve gone into fear-mode. How am I going to make this happen? Why is this not flowing? Push, push, push.
But when we trust that each step ahead of us is the exact one we’re meant to be taking, things change.
So how do we do it?
How do we switch off that lifetime of ‘doing’ to start trusting just ‘being’?
We start with the belief that there is a greater plan in play than we can ever imagine.
I like to think of life as a huge jigsaw puzzle – we’re creating the most magnificent picture we’ve ever seen. Each tiny piece of our life – each decision, each moment, each fail and each win, is another piece in the overall puzzle, we just can’t see how it all fits together just yet.
But it will.
One day, we’ll stand back and look at the puzzle of our life, and marvel. We’ll see that each of those ‘mis-steps’, stumbles and heartbreaks were actually integral to creating the picture that is us. Without them, our picture would not be complete. And it would not be so magnificent.
Surrender, and trust that even when it’s not what you planned, it’s all part of the divine plan.
If you want to know more about how to be the light, even in times of darkness, sign up here for an exclusive two part free training session with my mentor, Belinda Davidson. Available for a very limited time only, this training will change the way you look at yourself, the people you love, and how you live.